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Is My House Really that Messy?

Updated: Oct 30, 2022

Each August my mother-in-law and her sister spend an entire Saturday shopping at the mall. This tradition has quickly become one of my favorite days! Last year, I was invited to tag along as we sought out the perfect ‘Mother of the Groom’ dress for my mother-in-law to wear at my wedding. This year, I was invited simply because we had so much fun last year…..and I needed back to school clothes.

After a busy morning of shopping and a full bag of new dresses we parted ways. They continued shopping while I made my way to the church to sing for a wedding. Knowing that the girls would be coming back to my house after I was done singing, I was trying to plot out how I was going to rapidly clean before they got there. All I needed was 5 minutes to wipe the counters and sweep the floor but when I got home I found them giggling and chit chatting on my deck!

My first instinct was to feel embarrassed that my house was not perfectly clean. I often find myself saying things like, ‘I am so sorry my house is a disaster’ or ‘don't mind the mess, it's been a crazy day and I haven't had time to do the dishes!’ I desire for my living space to be welcoming and inviting to guests. There are times that I feel self conscious about the lack of aesthetic decor or embarrassed when things are out of place. I apologize for the slightest mess and struggle to vulnerably welcome others into my reality.

It is a bit silly that I have these feelings because I honestly don't care about whether someone else has dishes on the counter or an unfolded blanket on the couch. It is not my place to judge someone else's lifestyle. Jesus himself tells us to let go of our anxieties and rest in His company.

In the bible we find a story of two sisters, Martha and Mary. As Martha burdened herself with hosting and serving her guests, her sister Mary sat at the feet of Jesus. She chose to be fully present with Jesus and listen to him preach instead of fretting over the work that needed to be done. I am sure that Martha also had feelings of embarrassment. Maybe her kitchen was also a disaster (in her opinion) or maybe she did not have any food prepared to serve. When she brought her anxiety to Jesus he did not condemn her for having a messy kitchen. Instead he said to her, “ Martha, Martha, you are anxious and worried about many things. There is need of only one thing. Mary has chosen the better part and it will not be taken from her.”

As soon as I opened the door of my home to my mother-in-law and her sister I was reminded that their love for me was not based on the tidiness of my house. They affirmed my decor and brought attention to all of the ways I was making this house a home. I chose to model the actions of the younger sister, Mary, and enjoy the company of my two guests instead of fretting over the smudgy kitchen counters.

Let these words be a kind reminder to you that your worth is not based on what others see when they walk in the front door of your home. Your lifestyle does not reflect or dictate how people love you and the standard of a perfectly clean house is not for anyone else to decide but you!

Until Next Time~Your Sister in Christ,


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